Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Square Peg in a Round Hole

After the Thanksgiving weekend that i spent with Kristen and her family which was amazing by the way all the pains of having to plan and try to figure out my future came soaring back to me today. The result a 20 minute conversation with Kristen on why we still don't know what to do after like 3 months of being in the same situation. I am a problem solver and always have been i was the kid in third grade that people who had math problems they couldn't get would come to me to help them and the kid that people always wanted on their team to win candy for knowing the answer to geography questions. I solve things i fix problems i find a solution regardless of the circumstances....Until Now!!! School is winding down finally for me and i have to figure out where to live, where to work, where to continue my education, what kind of job should i get and in the midst of all these plans i also have to integrate the plans of my future wife Kristen Elizabeth Barfield. And after an emotional breakdown i cooled off went to work got my butt kicked aroung by 48,000 brown boxes(not an exaggeration on the number of boxes by the way) i heard some encouraging news from my lovely girlfriend. Trust God!!! It seems so easy but not for me in fact its one of the most difficult things i've ever had to do. I solve things and if i can't i obsess over them until they get fixed. But i can't when it comes to this. I've realized things that i have to have in this situation however. I need people that will truly pray for me on a consistent basis why??? because if like 25 people are all saying "Hey God J.C. can't figure out what's going on can you let Him in on what you're doing?" its a lot louder than just me even though God hears my prayer and has the capacity and willingness to grant my request without accompaniment. So i need prayer and time to weigh options but mostly just revelation from God. Even though its horribly cliche i need God to open and close doors and He will i just have to trust Him.

1 comment:

Andrew N. said...

Ok I would have to say I am right there with, its a very difficult thing to trust God for me most of the time. I know that my problems aren't like yours, but I still have a hard time trusting Him. Just to let you know I will start praying for you about these things.