Waiting.........

You know we get told to wait for so much in life. After speaking with one of my role models via myspace today i just realized how ready i am to be used in a larger context. I'm tired of being in the midst of my life process in order to get to the future of where i want to be. I wish people including myself could just realize that God has a plan for their life now. Now matter where, how old, what color, or personality that person is they are a tool in God's giant toolbox for the brokeness of this world. Why when you get older do you lose the zest for life that you had when you were young? Why do you feel like your life is over and you are just waiting on death to come to your door? Man if adults could wake up and pour themselves into those young people that they criticize all the time about not being mature or if the young people would quit excusing their behavior by saying that im just a kid. The crazy thing about a tool box is that all of the tools are different. Yeah some may look similar but they won't fit into the same spaces or get the job done as effectively as another tool. Yet while some tools may be used more than others what if you didn't have the one tool that you needed to get the job done that would suck huh? Well God desires to use each of us in a unique way and people always just disqualify themselves for the job with milliions of excuses not realizing that they are just the tool and the real work has to be done by the workman using the tool. I don't know maybe this is a farfetched metaphor but i just wish i could jump forward like 5 years and be finished with school, married to kristen with twins, and teaching and leading people but i know that im not ready and im frustrated and i want to get started learning and growing. Man waiting stinks especially when you have so much to do.

Looking Grim

Well the last scholarship application that i sent off was to an organization in SC that pays for students seeking to go into the ministry. Well i got an email from the organization that said they only give $100-$500 scholarships. So its looks like its gonna be super difficult to get the money that i need to go to NGU cuz i need $8000 however i believe that somehow someway God is going to provide. But besides that right now i would like to say to that organization put your money where your mouth is. You say that you want to pay for kids to go to school however you only give 100-500 dollars for college? Tell me what college costs 500 a semester??? This is the problem across the board with Christians they say and put on like they are doing some great thing but they aren't. And i know that i am coming off harsh because this organization is helpful and they may provide scholarships to like a million people im not sure but if you are gonna do something you should go all the way. Anyways Rick Gauge was at our church this past week and he was pretty awesome. He challenged us on many levels and i was impressed with him behind the pulpit. So that's where im at my God is awesome and He will overcome any obstacle in my way and He is guiding and teaching me each day what and where to go and how to get there so keep me in your prayers.

Waiting on a miracle

Yeah so i started this blog for people to see more of my life instead of my opinion on things...so the reason why named this blog Jehovah Jireh which means "God will provide" is because am waiting to see how God is going to provide things for the journey i believe He wants me to take. In our current society if you were to tell people that God speaks to you on a daily basis they will look at you weird and don't believe you at all and that's just the people that you go to church with. So here is the change... I planned on going to NGU for my master's degree and then marrying kristen sometime between then and learning and beginning my ministry. I just assumed that i should stay at memphis because if you don't know financially its unbelievable for me. But some things happened to open my eyes and it started when i went to NGU with J.R. we met the pres. of the school and i told him my plans and he asked why don't i transfer. I had never thought of that so i said i would think about it but really didn't. But then as i finished the semester at Memphis i realized just how frustrated i am here and how ready i am to get started. I know that i need work and that im not ready to go head first into ministry because i haven't opened myself up to God enough and then for like the whole month of May i felt like God told me to pursue going to NGU. So i am and i need the financial aid to go. I have $7500 in aid for transferring and now i am sending off a scholarship application to an organization ran by churches to provide scholarships to those going into the ministry. They know that God will use them in a way to provide for people that will in turn do incredible things for God because of their ministry and the love that they showed to those that they provided for. But the money that i need is a large amount that will not be easy i need $8800 a year to be able to go. I believe that God provides where He guides and i don't fear the result i know that God is in control and His will will be done. So that's where i'm at right now waiting on a miracle from God.